Friday, May 20, 2011

Become Financially Savvy

The experts tell us the economy is starting to recover. Whether we believe them or not it is prudent to increase our knowledge about financial matters. After all, knowledge is power. So unless we are an under the doghouse or in he mattress saver we need to be sure we understand as much as we can to make prudent investment choices.

The other day I was challenged to go to my financial institute's website and read about a topic that would improve my fiscal brain power. The choices were overwhelming- I guess they have a lot to tell us.  Here are a couple paragraphs forwarded from a friend and a translation of what they really mean:

Paragraph 1

"We can offer you a personalized financial strategy, not a generic investment program. Your individual portfolio will be based on your unique situation, your attitudes, preferences and goals. It will be designed to account for change, both in the market and in your circumstances, so that it can work with you and for you at every stage of your life." 
We know you have no idea what your financial picture looks like, what the word "portfolio" even means, and that you have little time to pay attention to and understand the markets, but we'll take your money anyway and use a lot of fancy words to tell you we're going to try our best to make money off of you while making you feel good about it.

Paragraph 2

Our approach to investing is straightforward: we focus on becoming your partner in building the future you desire. As we work together, our advisors will thoroughly explain the investment strategies recommended, so that you'll be fully comfortable with all aspects of your investment program. Every decision we make will be focused on achieving the results you want. Our mission is to help our clients achieve financial independence through professional advice, sound risk management, quality investment products, and personal, efficient service.


Our approach is to obscure the process in a way that provides maximum confusion causing you to ignore your portfolio, allowing us to maximize our profits by charging you a small fee to do so. But don't worry, we'll send you an even more confusing report once in a while, just to make you feel good. Since you're a "results" person, our loan officers are standing by to pile on a mountain of debt so you can buy all the "stuff" you don't need and can't afford. Because we care about YOU. 

Thanks, Jeremy. Here is a little something for all your hard work in cleaning the mud puddle. Mama says to wipe your feet before you come in.